Search This Blog

Monday, June 28, 2010

Mending Fences in Families and Education

It seems like my nephews were in diapers just a few years ago, but they're all grown up now.  I often wonder what affect I've had on them.  A positive one, hopefully.  I always try to walk that fine line between having fun with kids and ensuring that I'm responsible and mature enough so that they feel secure.  I remember walking with one of my nephews when he was 5 or 6 and was already getting in trouble in kindergarten.  I observed his movements, how he used a stick to touch every fence board we passed, and paid close attention to his words.  I really wanted to know what he thought.  We talked about "following through" and being a "man of your words".  He got that.  I watched him stop at the end of a unique "fence" made of heavy chain and, without thinking, pick up a piece that had come apart, fiddle with it for a moment, and figure out how to re-connect it.  This child, who was in trouble at school, figured out something that some of my friends could not have fixed.  He fixed a stranger's fence without having to be asked.  He understood the concepts of honesty and integrity and the strengths that they build within a person.  We had fun that day and he learned some new concepts.  I learned that strong, intelligent children can't always fix the broken chains of the educational system, but they keep on trying.  If we would only listen and observe more and sit around in meetings less...

Friday, June 25, 2010

LIghten Up! Learn and Have Fun.

While most workers complain about their managers (mine probably do), they probably don't see that some managers truly appreciate them.  We all can get "lost" in the moments of everyday and not realize that, even though somebody is telling us to do something that we don't like, they are simultaneously appreciating us for what we do, caring about us, and aware of our interdependence.  My biggest "management mistake" is that I don't know how to have "fun".  I enjoy working, so it's "fun" for me.  Studying theories, discussing difficult topics... that's all "fun" to me.  I'm lucky enough, however, to have some co-workers who will talk to me about the need for adults to have fun while they learn (just as kids do).  They get a little defensive when I don't understand, but that's okay because I'm stubborn and too often seek to be understood first.  How many parents get into the same types of situations?  A child is trying to express something, but the parent can't (or won't) understand, and then frustration and arguments ensue because the parent wants the child to understand his/her point of view first.  A kid, for example, is just having "fun" pretending to paint with water on the porch and gets in trouble, even though the porch will, eventually, dry up.  No harm done, but the child did safely learn something about the properties of water and build some skills.  That's what my staff is trying to help me understand now, and that's what I'm trying to share with you.  I see it well in children, but not adults.  We "old folk" can have fun while learning, too.  Why not get down with your kid and "paint" the porch with a brush and some water?  It's water!  You could paint the whole house and not hurt anything, but it will help the child to learn, to build coordination and muscle skills, and everyone will have one more great memory to put in the most important "bank" of all.  Thanks to my staff for being patient with me and helping me to see that adult learning can, and should, be fun!  Thanks to those of you who read this blog, I know that it can be "technical" and not so "fun", so I'm going to try to incorporate more fun stories, anecdotes, etc. in future posts.  Keep it tuned to this channel and let's have fun going down this slide of life!

Monday, June 21, 2010

The Only Real Job

Work, work, work!  Sometimes that's all that we think about.  Work, bills, recreation, and so many other things that make our lives very, very busy.  It seems like there's a never ending "to do" list on ever refrigerator. There's one job, however, that must come before them all because it is the only true job in the world.  Parenting.  Strip away all of the technology, this computer, cars, houses, and everything else that we humans have made to make life "easier" (is that working?) and we all have the same job at some point in life.  The job of an adult human is to raise children to be adult humans.  That's it.  Hunting, gathering, working - it's all part of the job of raising children and survival of the species.  With that in mind, we need to remember to drop what we're doing and take our children fishing, hunting, to the library, bike riding, to play basketball, to feed the ducks at the park... whatever we like to do with our children, that's what we need to do.  Our lives together are brief and our #1 job is raising children, so let's take it seriously, but also remember that we are the bosses and if we say "Let's have some fun!" then we can have fun!  Stay firm, be consistent, and spend that time parenting that will truly pay off in the end.

Thursday, June 17, 2010

Work it OUT!

In the world of early childhood education (ECE) there is an imaginary controversy between the role that genetics play in the development of a child's behavior, personality, skills, etc. and the role that the parents and caregivers play.  It's called "Nature vs. Nurture" and it is simply silly!  It also shows the need for a higher level of professionalism, education, and critical thinking in the world of early childhood education.  Biology, for example, is always called "Biology".  Early childhood educators, however, can't agree on something as simple as a name; therefore, the field is sometimes referred to as "child development".  Which one is right?  Who cares?  We just need to find ONE name and stick to it!  Doing so will allow us to differentiate between daycare, pre-school, and other education categories.  Today, you can go to college for biology and become a biologist.  You can go to school for ECE and open a daycare, work at a daycare, teach pre-school, work with developmentally disabled students, work in public schools, etc.  The field doesn't differentiate between the drastically different jobs that educators who work with young children have, which means that we can't "specialize" and must, therefore, use whomever we can find to work with children, regardless of special gifts, needs, challenges, or situations.  What this means is that the lowest paid, least educated and least experienced employees are usually placed in "one on one" situations with the children who have the most diverse and challenging needs.  This is like having the least experienced, lowest paid nurse in a hospital working with the critical care patients.  It has a severe impact on the children and families who are expecting the best, but getting the worst.  There are times when a "Special Needs Aide", earning just over minimum wage, has a "natural talent", or experience with his/her own child(ren) that allows him/her to provide high levels of service, but that is the exception, not the rule.  These disputes over ECE or Child Development, nature or nurture, and other ridiculous tiffs that educators won't find the middle ground on, leave the field in a crisis and those affected are those whom we all care for the most.  In a world where we teach "cooperation over competition" we also argue over nature vs. nurture, a competitive name for two factors that must, do, and always will cooperate with one another.  ECE instructors, daycare providers, child development professionals, pre-school teachers, and others who fall under the gigantic umbrella of ECE (or child development) must learn to do the same.  Nobody's perfect, but let's at least agree on a name, put the most educated/experienced with the children who have the highest needs, and reach the next level of professionalism.

Tuesday, June 15, 2010

Time to Make Time

I'm back in the blogosphere!  Our daughters are growing up fast!  The oldest is bi-lingual and learning numbers and letters in English and Spanish.  The youngest is beginning to talk and walk.  It's so exciting!  We live in a beautiful, tree and animal filled, rural community.  Sarah, our three year old, told me that we have "sparkly nights".  Brilliant description, no?  Also, a perfect reminder of why it's so important to actually slow down and listen to our kids.  One of my coworkers mentioned that parents are always in such a hurry that they don't seem to have the time to do positive guidance and/or discipline.  I'm glad that she brought that point up.  We talked about the world being able to "wait", but that the child can't wait.  The T.V. can be turned off without any major consequences.  Dinner can be 15 minutes late and people won't starve.  90% of whatever people are doing can be "put off" for a few minutes so that the child's need for guidance can be met.  Your T.V. will not suffer without your eyes and ears, but your child will; which will you choose?