Parents Learn to Play

Conversations about “helping or hurting” that inspire children to think about what they're doing are effective. Yelling, “Stop hurting him!” does not have the same effect as asking the question “Are you helping or hurting?” and then continuing with "What are you trying to accomplish?" Help your child find a way to meet his/her own needs through thought, the way that you would. Remember, the world is new to them and they can't process information, nor assess situations as quickly as an adult; therefore it is our job to help them learn how to do that. Questions (as opposed to threats or statements) help the child to think about what they're doing and, as parents, we want to teach our children how to think clearly and act responsibly. We are what we do, not what we say. Creative play helps children to think through situations and act out possible reactions, outcomes, etc. in a safe and controlled environment. Safe environments that allow for experimentation help children to learn quickly due to low levels of stress and high levels of environmental control. Speak with your children, not to them. Get on the floor and remember how to play. If you've forgotten how to play - how to imagine that you're flying an airplane or conquering a foe - then you have something to learn from your child because I'll bet you that they know exactly how to have fun with imagination. In order to teach, one must first know how to learn. Young children learn through play, so in order for us to teach them, we must first know how to play with them!