Sarah, our two year old, and Frances, our newborn, have been keeping us very busy. Sarah is testing out her new limits with the baby in the house. She's been “shaking” the crib, she has “smacked” Frances on the head twice, and has attempted to ignore our parental pleas for her to stop. Sarah is simply taking some time to learn what she can and can not do with and to the new baby and the new things in the environment, like the changing table and crib. We have, as parents, decided that she must stay off of her sister's crib and changing table, but can retrieve “burp” cloths and other items for us. When the older child is “included” in some of the child rearing tasks then they develop a closer bond with the baby and with the parents. Sarah also likes to help “fold” the baby's laundry (although we have to re-fold it when she's done!). She may not do it to adult standards, but it's not about folding for her. It gives her a sense of “involvement” and “helping”. It's also an opportunity for Sarah to learn how to fold clothes more effectively, but that's secondary to learning to care for each other and help out around the house. Remember that the older child can help, it's simply a matter of both parents agreeing on limits, restricting what is unsafe and allowing the child to do whatever is within their skill level, helpful and safe.
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